The Great Depression...

As things seem to be going from bad to worse in the economy the references to the Great Depression become more frequent. I am left to wonder if we really understand the magnitude of the events that took place in that era and how it shaped a generation and if the events of today are a fair comparison. The picture on the left is that of Florence Owens Thompson, it was taken by Dorothea Lange in 1936 and titled " Migrant Mother". It is perhaps one of the single most powerful images of the time. Study the picture...the lines on her forehead, the worry of her brow, the way her hand is placed to the side of her cheek and the eyes most telling of all. It captured the heartache, desperation, despair and hopelessness of a people. When I was kid my parents would talk of this time, for this was the time in which they themselves were children and tried to convey what it was like growing up in this period; it was this time that would shape a part of who they were and how they would live their lives. It is only now as an adult that I have come to realize what sacrifices they must have made while we were kids to ensure that we would have opportunities and choices in life.

Growing up in a rural area I can remember even as a child of how important it was to my parents to make sure we had the garden planted in early spring. It wasn't one of these little backyard gardens you see now, with 9 kids to feed it was an all out effort to make sure we had enough to make it through the winter without having to spend any more than necessary at the country store in town.We started by getting the potatoes in the ground by Good Friday which was usually in March.My parents would get 100 pounds of seed potato and the adults would pull a chair up to one of those big wash tubs and begin cutting them into sections with just the right amount of eyes per slice to make for a good plant later.While this was going on Dad would be plowing the fields and getting them ready and when everything was prepared all of us would have a job to do. While Dad was making the rows one of the older kids would side dress with fertilizer and the little ones would place the seeds into the rows spaced the right distance apart while some of the other kids would follow behind with hoe in hand to cover with dirt.

Next came the plant beds. Throughout the year we would save wood and any limbs that may have fallen due to storms and such and would collect them into one big brush pile and burn them to cleanse the area to plant seed so when mid May came around we would already have seedlings ready for transplant in the main garden. At that time there were few if any nurseries and few could afford them anyway. When May came around it was a nonstop work because now was The Time......time for planting.....tomatoes,corn, green beans,squash,peppers and along with that came the seasonal items that mother nature provided like good ole blackberries. Mom would send all us kids out to pick wild berries to bring back so she could put up for winter like most other items.

After weeks and months of back breaking work to ensure a bountiful harvest, come mid-July some of the vegetables were ready for picking and from then on until late September it was a hectic time trying to get as much as possible canned and put up for the winter months. Even though Mom and Dad worked in the factory that didn't stop them from coming home and doing a full days work there as well. As the youngest, once I entered school my Mom took a job at the factory to help meet the needs of a growing family. But without fail they would get home and start working and would continue until after dark. Their day usually started long before sunrise, Mom would get up at 4:00 am and head to the kitchen to make breakfast and Dad would soon follow and they would sit down to eat together.They would then prepare for work at the factory and do some chores before waking us kids for breakfast and getting us ready when school was in session or in the summer months waking some of the older kids a little after 6:00 am to let them know they were leaving for work.

Yet, all of this was just a small fraction in the effort, work and sacrifice my parents put forth, never thinking of themselves, instead striving to make a better life for us kids. As a young adult and amazed at how they managed to raise all us kids. I asked my Mom once how they did it.....

Her response was a simple one......" Oh, we just threw another bean in the pot"

.....It is only now as I have grown older that I have slowly begun to realize how much I took for granted while I was being raised. Although we may have never had the latest and greatest in the world in terms of material things. I have come to recognize that I have received more in this life than most and it was through the hardships that my parents endured and the sacrifice they made while I was growing up.

The thoughts of a weary mind...

I had hoped that the time off these last few days would have brought me a renewed sense of self and the rest I so desired. Instead, the time is quickly closing in when I will have to return to that which makes up my everyday life having found neither as if it were a game of cat and mouse, only to grow tired in the process. In sleep I found little that would bring solace to the mind as the relentlessness of thought continued to race foward even as my body lay dormant. I would awake in the morning as though the hours that had passed were only a few minutes in time. I have accomplished little in the past few days, a time in which should have been a rejuvenation of mind, body and spirit will instead have disappeared with nothing to show for it but the growing restlessness that seems to be a constant companion by my side.

Once again I will be faced with the task of putting on a worthy performance so those around me will not see the struggle going on inside. Contentment seems to becoming an elusive foe and one in which appears to be a worthy opponent. So at least for now, I will put on the mask of satisfaction and strength, for to do otherwise would only invite the wolves to the door in what would surely be a massacre in the stampede that would follow.

New Beginnings...?

"New Beginnings"... The last few days I have heard these words repeated many times in refering to the start of a new year but what does it really mean? I suspect you would probably get a different answer from each person this question is asked. For some, it will be a time in which they will reinvent themselves; an effort to shed that which is on the exterior in the hope that they will be viewed in a new light. For others, they will turn their focus to the interior; seeking self enlightenment to give themselves new purpose and meaning in life. Yet still, there will be those who choose neither; for they will walk the path of yesterday and strive to correct the failures of the past. There will be those who through no fault of their own a "new beginning" will be thrust upon them, although not of their choosing they are forced into a different direction.

.....but for each new beginning must something come to an end? That's a question that I really don't know the answer but it reminds me of something I once read....

Without failure how would we know where we've been?

Without success how would we know where we want to go?

Without both how would we know how to get there?

I just thought those three phrases ring so true.....although my failures are many and my successes few I will not turn my back on tomorrow and live yesterday. I will take that next step in my search no matter where it might lead me and should my time on this earth come to an end before I reach that destination I will have left knowing that I was not the same person I was yesterday.....for that will be my greatest success!